If you have a spare £795,000 knocking about and fancy living down the road from vegetable-shunning Tory politician Jacob Rees-Mogg, here's an old house you might fancy buying.
We've not sold it well so far, have we? Apologies. But, as an unrelenting estate agent might say, "this baby sells itself".
It sort of does, you know. You get a hell of a lot for well under £1 million.
The Old Court is a 150-year-old Grade II Listed property with seven bedrooms. And the Victorian home has kept its majestic period features, including vaulted ceilings, lavish stonework... and a magistrates' court.
Ah yes. There it is. The 800 sq/ft house, not far from Bristol in Temple Cloud in the Somerset countryside, used to be a working court house.
The grand hall, now used as a dining room, saw many trials. Below it, the original jail cells have been kept – and turned into bedrooms. Even the hatches remain, which staff once used to pass food to prisoners awaiting trial.
In recent years, The Old Court has been used as a luxury guest house. But its owner, John Hampson, has decided that now is the time to sell.
Semi-retired businessman John, 68, said: "We have been here for nearly 20 years.
"We moved from a flat in London because we wanted our young children to have an inside and outside space.
"The most distinctive part is the former courtroom. It is a rather grand room. You can get 60-70 people in there for an event or sit and read a book by the fire.
"We have loved it here but our children have grown up now so there's just the two of us so we don't need something this size."
In the main house, there are five bedrooms, a lounge, dining room, study, second reception room, a gym, and a sauna. The three 'jail cell' bedrooms have been made comfortable. No rats or syphilis.
Indeed, perhaps the only downside is living smack bang in the middle of Rees-Mogg's constituency. Although it was his ancestors who probably funded the house's construction, so we should be thankful for that at least.
David Wild, who's been tasked with selling the home, said: "Having been constructed in 1857, the property has a rich history. It was previously a divisional magistrates court and police station, and has over the years been transformed into a residence of style and charm."