There aren't many 32-year-old footballers that every football fan in the world would love their team to sign. But then, there aren't many footballers like Luka Modric. According to the Express, Croatia's most desirable 30something could be on the move this summer – and the lucky team to get him will be Tottenham (again).
The paper says Spurs have made a "bestial" offer for the Real Madrid midfielder – a quote/translation it has taken directly from Spanish rumour rag Don Balon, who originally wrote/made up the story.
If you're not sure what a "bestial offer" entails, the Oxford Dictionary definition of this adjective describes it as "of or like an animal or animals". An alternative definition is "savagely cruel and depraved".
Either way, it sounds like Tottenham chairman Daniel Levy is determined to get his man. (And will use animals to help him if that's what it takes?)
Modric has apparently been made a "priority target" for the north Londoners, who are encouraged by reports that Real are lining up Bayern Munich's Thiago Alcantara as a replacement.
And it will be nice for Luka and his family to spend some time in London again before he starts his six-year jail sentence for perjury.
Liverpool join race for Jack Grealish
Another alleged Tottenham midfield target, Jack Grealish, is now reportedly wanted by Liverpool too. The Sun says the Reds have moved into pole position for the Aston Villa starlet because Spurs are unwilling to meet the Championship side's asking price.
Levy has apparently been "haggling" over the fee, as he does, and refusing to pay more than £20m for Grealish despite Villa demanding £40m. This has allowed Reds manager Jurgen Klopp to swoop in and "change the complexion of the transfer completely", whatever that means.
Manchester United have been offered the chance to sign Bayern Munich defender Jerome Boateng for £50m, says the Manchester Evening News. The German is reportedly on an "eight-man shortlist" of centre-backs compiled by manager Jose Mourinho, and he is probably the most expensive and injury prone player on it.
The Red Devils have also received encouragement, of sorts, in their pursuit of Gareth Bale. Sky Sports says the Welshman will only stay with Real Madrid if they give him "assurances" that he will be a first-team regular next season, but they might not want to do that.
Meanwhile, United will face competition from Inter Milan for the West Ham forward Marko Arnautovic, claims the Mirror. The Austrian, who played three games for Inter during a disappointing loan spell nine years ago, could move back to the San Siro in part exchange for Joao Mario, who was on loan to the Hammers last season. West Ham are not very keen on this plan though.
Elsewhere, the Irons are "increasingly confident" of wrapping up a £35m deal for the Lazio winger Felipe Anderson (Telegraph), England midfielder Ruben Lofus-Cheek has admitted he may have to quit Chelsea in the summer to secure regular first-team football (Mirror) and Newcastle are desperately trying to offload Senegalese midfielder Henri Saivet by "offering him to clubs across Europe" (Chronicle).
Maybe Alan Sugar will give him a job as a gesture of goodwill to all the Senegalese people he racially abused on Twitter yesterday.