11 orange things we would rather become US president than Donald Trump
For years Donald Trump's orange complexion has been subjected to as much humorous derision as his claims he could become US president.
Well now he's gone and done it and is indeed becoming president. However, he shouldn't expect those jokes about his fake tan to be going away any time soon...
It's all too easy to make jokes, but there's quite a few people not feeling too happy about the Trump presidency. So, to lighten the mood, we'd like to suggest some other orange options for president.
1. An orange
Where better to start than the orangiest thing there is. And where is famous for oranges? That's right, Florida - that most important of swing states.
If there's a leader Florida could get on board with it's the orange - in fact maybe that's why they voted Trump in the first place?
We're sure the orange could come up with some much juicer policy proposals than Trump any day.
2. A pumpkin
For those of you still looking back fondly towards Halloween, president pumpkin is the one. What could be better for America's Thanksgiving celebrations too?
Mm president pumpkin pie... God bless America.
3. Ivanka Trump in an orange top
Okay so perhaps this wouldn't mean a huge amount of policy changes from her father's administration - but the glass ceiling preventing women from reaching the top job would finally have been broken.
4. Some red Leicester
This would probably have the highest approval ratings in history.
Mmm cheese toastie... God bless America - and Leicester.
5. An Oompa Loompa
We know you're thinking "but we've already got an Oompa Loompa as president" but that's where you're wrong. Oompa Loompas get things done.
When Willy Wonka gave his Oompa Loompas a task they got to it in a heartbeat - they'd have that wall built in weeks, if you're into that sort of thing.
6. This beautiful egg yoke
If you don't like eggs then, please, you need kicking out faster than a crying baby at a Trump rally. Plus Americans love eggs - what could be more unifying to the country right now than a big burger with an egg in it?
This cool orange cat's love for lasagne would surely be a hit with the Italian-American vote, and maybe we need a president who's a bit more laid back? It looks like he's up for running too.
Oh and another thing, there's already been a president Garfield. James Abram Garfield became the 20th president of the USA in 1881 - and he was a pretty impressive guy.
Sadly Garfield was assassinated late that year, but not before he uttered these immortal words: "Man cannot live by bread alone; he must have peanut butter."
And Trump said he has the best words...
8. Some sweet potato fries
What would you rather see? Donald Trump arriving to meet with Theresa May over foreign policy or America just sending a big tub of sweet potato fries? Exactly.
9. This orange inflatable owl
Who's going to mess with America with this thing swooping about?
We had a picture and we used it, is that such a crime?
10. Hillary Clinton if Trump did manage to throw her in jail
-- RealTalk (@SmallAxe2016) October 18, 2016
When the email scandal came to light Trump promised to put Clinton in jail if he won.
The case against her has been dropped and no criminality was found by the FBI - and therefore Clinton going to jail is pretty impossible. But you have to admit she'd be a perfect candidate for this list.
11. A sunset
If Trump has shown us anything, it's that we've got to start thinking more abstractly about what can and can't be a president. Well, how about we take it to a new, more beautiful, level.
Quite honestly, after a week like this, sitting and watching the sun set in the distance is probably exactly what we, and people across America, need.
Seriously though. Why is Trump orange?