Six signs your partner is cheating on you

Subtle clues they could be having an affair

man sitting on the bed with two women on the back

Do you suspect that your partner could be having an affair? While these six subtle signs are in no way conclusive, it's worth knowing what to look out for ...

See also: The real reason men cheat

See also: Signs your wife is cheating on you

1. He over fabricates
You ask your husband why he's late, and he says: "Traffic was a nightmare."

A man who has something to hide might respond: "I left work at 6pm on the dot, but I got stuck behind a tractor, which slowed me down for half an hour. And then I ran into roadworks - you know the ones by the ring road - which took another 20 minutes. I nearly gave you a call, but I didn't want to pull over. Traffic was a nightmare."

People with nothing to hide give short answers. Liars tend to provide lots of detail in an attempt to sound convincing. If you ask a question and get a "story" in reply (particularly if your partner isn't usually so communicative) you might want to ask yourself why.

2. She stops talking about the wonderful new guy
A new guy joins your wife's office/gym/evening class and she can't stop talking about him. It's David this, and David that. And then suddenly, there's no mention of David.

If you ask about him, she'll shrug and quickly change the subject. Is it because David is no longer so witty/clever/interesting? Or is it because her feelings have developed from casual admiration to something more?

3. Watch their body language
If your partner literally can't "look you in the eye", it could be a sign they have something to hide. People with a guilty conscience tend to avoid making direct eye contact – particularly while they are lying or if you ask them a question that could get them found out.

Beware, however. Some people will go the other way and overdo the eye contact in an effort to appear trustworthy. Notice if they stare into your eyes more than usual, or if they place their palms face up on the table when professing that they have nothing to hide.

If their gestures appear natural and how they normally behave, you could be worried about nothing. However, if their eyes seem a little too wide, or their gestures seem exaggerated, they could be using their body language to try and fool you. The difference can be subtle, so go with your instinct.

4. She's suddenly hard to contact
Just because you can't get hold of her one day, or her phone battery dies, doesn't mean she's cheating. But if you find that she's suddenly hard to reach, but was always easily contactable before, you may want to ask yourself why.

Is the phone reception in your area terrible, when it was fine six months ago? Is her phone battery that dodgy it dies at least once a week? Is she suddenly so forgetful, she's always leaving her mobile in the car or at work?

There might be a good reason why you can't reach her – or it might be because she's otherwise engaged.

5. He's secretive
When you walk into the room, he flicks shut his laptop or switches screens. And these days, he seems to take his mobile phone with him everywhere . . . including the bathroom.

A change in behaviour around technology is a classic warning sign of a cheat. If you usually go to bed at the same time, and now your other half is staying up late on their computer or phone, it could be because they're emailing/texting someone.

6. They protest too much
You jokingly mention that he's working late a lot, or tease him about why he doesn't answer his phone these days. Instead of making a quip in reply or rolling his eyes, he crosses his arms and gets defensive.

Cheats can be hyper-sensitive at the merest mention of any wrongdoing. If they over-react to the smallest comment, you might have touched a nerve.