After a new poll was released showing former President Donald Trump beating current President Joe Biden in five crucial swing states, the hosts of late night had plenty to say about it.
Almost exactly one year before the presidential election, new polls from The New York Times and Siena College that were published Sunday showed Trump leading Biden by 10 points in Nevada, six points in Georgia, five points in Arizona, five points in Michigan and four points in Pennsylvania.
Here’s how the late-night hosts reacted to it.
The Daily Show with guest host Sarah Silverman
Donald Trump took the stand and it went about as well as you'd expect. pic.twitter.com/37HrBl73tL
— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) November 7, 2023
“A new poll shows Joe Biden getting trounced by Donald Trump in almost every single swing state. Don’t panic, it’s too early to say Biden will definitely lose, he could absolutely die in his sleep instead.”
“I’m just saying this is really scary for liberals, and I mean actually scary not like, 'They took Hamilton off Disney+' scary.”
“You know what? I’m gonna be honest, I like a scary poll number, it puts a little fire under your tuchus. This is a wake up call to Joe Biden. I mean no really, Joe wake up!” (clapping hands)
“What makes these poll numbers particularly shocking is that the man Biden is losing to is currently on trial in every jurisdiction in America.”
Jimmy Kimmel Live!
“Trump is ahead of Biden in five of the six battleground states. Which is something I can barely wrap my head around. It's like after The Return of the Jedi, the people in the galaxy were like, ‘Ya know, this Princess Leia is kind of a dud. Why don't we give the emperor another shot?'”
“According to the poll, voters under 30 only favor Biden over Trump by a single point — it's that close. Young voters are said to be disenchanted with Biden's position on climate change and Palestinian rights, so they're leaning towards a guy who believes in neither of those things.”
“A lot of it's about age, but this isn't a choice between some old codger and a young up-and-comer. This is a choice between Mr. Burns and Mr. Magoo.”
“Remember, as hard as this is to believe, polling a year ahead of an election is always super accurate. And if you don't believe me, just ask President Hillary Clinton.”
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
“It has a lot of people talking. Here look at this whole thing,” Fallon said as a pie chart graphic came up. “When asked ‘Who should be president in 2024?,’ 15 percent said, 'Donald Trump.' Ten percent said, 'Joe Biden.' Seventy-four percent said, 'No. We are absolutely not doing this. Absolutely not. The election is 364 days away so take your little poll and lose my number. I don’t have the mental energy for this. Honestly, I’m just trying to make it to Thursday’s Golden Bachelor. I’m not deciding between Trump and Biden before Gerry decides between Theresa and Faith. They both have such a zest for life. I don’t know what Gerry is going to do. All I know is that he’s proven that love doesn’t have an expiration date. Which is a nice way of saying: You can still get freaky deaky in your 70s.' And finally 1 perecent said, ‘Ron DeSantis.’”
“It’s not a good sign when a lot of Biden’s advisors are like, ‘Good news though, sir, you’re leading in Guam.’”
“Since whatever he’s doing is working, Trump plans to commit at least 90 more felonies.”
Late Night With Seth Meyers
“I know we are a full year away from the election and its natural and normal for people to express their frustration with the incumbent at this point in the calendar. The same thing happened with Obama too and then he went on to easily beat Mitt Romney. In fact, Gallup’s final poll before the election had Romney ahead. So there’s no reason to panic. On the other hand, we have to start f***ing panicking now! We are f***ed, f***, f***, f***,” he yelled as he put three prop lit cigarettes in his mouth from an earlier bit.
“So I guess this new poll makes Trump the frontrunner, not just for the GOP nomination but for the whole deal,” he said before sarcastically adding, “Haha, yeah I mean, OK cool, what a world.”
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon and Late Night With Seth Meyers air on NBC; Jimmy Kimmel Live! airs on ABC; The Daily Show airs on Comedy Central.