Come all you weary...tyres. Citroen opens 'tyre hotel'

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Tyre in snow
Citroen is getting its sipes stuck into the lucrative winter tyre market by opening a 'Tyre Hotel' service, in a fit of marketing mumbo jumbo. It's basically a warehouse with shelves.

Still, the Citroen Winter Tyre Programme, as it's officially known, will provide a useful service for drivers with enough concern and disposable income to buy seasonal rubber this year.

Citroen's initiative is simple: sell punters a set of winter tyres, then charge them more to store their summer ones for a few months.

And of course, when it's time to take the winter tyres off (March/April), the buyer will need somewhere to keep those too.

Therefore, Citroen will accommodate this seasonal tyre rotation by charging £179 per year for storage.

In fairness, it's a good idea for those without a garage or spare guest room in which to keep four skanky tyres; funnily enough, Peugeot has just announced that it will be offering exactly the same service.

Peugeot explains that while some tyres will be stored on site (at the dealership), most will go to a separate facility designed specifically to keep them "in the correct conditions to prevent any damage or distortion" - almost the exact words used to entice guests into the last hotel we stayed in, as it happens.

Photographs of stored tyres will be taken, so as to avoid any sneaky customers trying to snaffle brand new ones by claiming the clumsy hotel staff have damaged them.

Skoda, Volvo and BMW have also announced winter tyre programmes, although shortages are expected – despite a survey showing that 95 percent of UK drivers have no intention of switching rubber in preparation for the forecasted snow CHAOS.

Ah well, at least there'll be plenty more free-falling car videos to enjoy over the next few months...