Earlier this week a Press Association Freedom of Information (FOI) request revealed that Manchester City and Manchester United paid almost £2million on policing costs between them in the 2015-16 season, while the five London Premier League clubs under the jurisdiction of the Metropolitan Police paid under £200,000 combined.
Now, after some deep investigative digging, we can reveal exactly what all that extra money goes on.
Banter, of the highest quality.
-- GMP - Newton Heath (@GMPNewtonHeath) August 13, 2016
It's the only explanation.
It takes top dollar to find comedy writers capable of composing the above tweet, which, if you didn't get it, is saying that Sunderland, a team that isn't Manchester United, sign so many Manchester United youth and ex players that they have become Manchester United's B team.
Again, Sunderland and Manchester United are completely different teams. Hilarious!
In fairness Sunderland have long had the reputation as a retirement home for United players, with current residents including such fossils as John O'Shea. Other younger residents include Adnan Januzaj, on loan, as well as Paddy McNair and Donald Love.
Do you see why the joke was funny? Definitely worth a couple million.
We await our Pulitzer Prize patiently.